


Definition of Insanity

by PanicFOB



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: F/M, Fluff and Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-21
Updated: 2019-09-21
Packaged: 2020-10-25 00:42:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,066
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20715260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PanicFOB/pseuds/PanicFOB
Summary: Steve has a gut feeling that something is wrong with Y/N, and he finally decides to confront her about it. Inspired by the lyrics of Break My Heart by FINNEAS.





	Definition of Insanity

Steve was pacing in the dark kitchen of the compound at one in the morning. He couldn’t get over the unsettled feeling he’d been having for a week now. Something was very wrong, and he really didn’t like what that might mean for his future.

A light flicked on. “Steve? What are you doing up?” It was Bucky.

“I’m just stressed, Buck. I can’t sleep.”

His friend walked over and sat down on a stool at the bar. “What are you stressed about?”

“I don’t know if I should say.”

“Why not?”

“Because if I speak it, then I might somehow make it come true.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “You’re so goddamn overdramatic about everything. Just tell me what’s got you so worked up.”

“It’s Y/N. I think she’s going to leave me again.”

“What? Why?”

“I don’t know. I sort of have this gut feeling. I remember how she acted before she did it the first time, and now she’s been acting that same way for a week. Something’s definitely wrong, but she won’t talk to me. I’m terrified, Bucky.”

“What exactly has she been doing that’s the same as before she broke up with you the first time?”

“She hardly lets me kiss her. She’s way less talkative and playful. She doesn’t want to… well, you know. And normally she wants to do that all the time. I’ve asked her if something is bothering her or if I did anything wrong, but she tells me no every time. I just don’t know what to do.”

“Steve, if it’s got you this out of sorts, you just need to confront her about it. Tell her you know for a fact that something is wrong and that in order to have a healthy relationship, the two of you need to have better communication.”

“And what if she says she wants to break up again? Then what do I do?”

“Then you either beg her to stay or you realize that trying to make it work with a person that keeps breaking your heart is the definition of insanity.”

“I don’t want to lose her, Buck.”

“Then beg her to stay.” Bucky left the kitchen then, and Steve stayed up the rest of the night thinking back to that first miserable time she broke him into pieces.

They had been together for eleven months, and Steve had been planning something romantic for their one-year anniversary. She’d sent him a text while he was on a mission asking him to come by her apartment when the mission was over. He rushed there, figuring she wanted sex and cuddling. Instead, a cold demeanor had greeted him. She hadn’t seemed like the Y/N he knew at all.

“I got a job offer in California, Steve.”

“Wow, that’s quite a distance. It’ll make things complicated, but we can make it work,” he said with optimism on his face.

“I don’t think we should though. This is already complicated enough with your missions and responsibilities, I don’t think we could manage the distance.”

“What are you saying?” His lip was nearly quivering from his effort to hold back a tear.

“I’m taking the job offer, and I think we should end things now before I go.”

He’d begged her to stay that night, telling her how much he loved her, how much their relationship meant to him. None of it seemed to make any difference, though. She left him all the same. He wasn’t sure he had it in himself to beg like that again.

She’d quit that job in California after only four months. She’d come back with her tail between her legs, admitting how stupid she had been to leave him, how she realized she couldn’t live without him. She swore that she knew now that they only made sense together. He’d believed her. But now, he wondered if she was doubting their love and connection once again.

Just before daybreak, Steve went to the gym to work on a few punching bags. He turned Bucky’s words over and over again in his head. Was he really insane to keep putting all his hopes of a future into this woman? He never doubted how he felt about her, but was it crazy of him to willingly give someone the opportunity to break him twice?

After his workout, he found Y/N in the common area, curled up on the couch watching a movie and crying.

He rushed over to her and pulled her into his arms. “Please tell me what’s wrong, doll. I’m really sorry for whatever it is I’ve done.”

She wiped at her eyes. “It’s nothing Steve, really.”

This continued effort to hide her emotions from him was getting really frustrating. “If you’re going to break up with me, just do it already,” he blurted out.

Her mouth fell open, and she looked at him, stunned. “What?”

“That’s what this is about, right? You don’t want to be with me anymore. You’re pushing me away.”

She shook her head furiously. “No, Steve. You know how much I love you, and when I told you that I’d never do that to you again, I meant it.”

He felt a huge relief that she was for sure not going to leave him, but he was still confused about her recent closed-off demeanor toward him. “Then please tell me what’s really going on. I can’t take this space between us any longer,” he demanded.

“Steve, I’m sorry if it felt like I was pushing you away… I’ve just been really stressed… and I’ve been trying to figure out a way to tell you the news…”

“News? What news?”

“Steve… I’m pregnant.”

His heart sped up furiously in the most joyful of ways. “Really?!”

“Really. I found out last week, and I was worried about what you would think because I’m sure it’s gonna be hard to be Captain America and a dad at the same time.”

He leaned his face to hers and kissed her lips fiercely. When he pulled away, he wore a giant grin. “I am so happy about this, Y/N… as long as you’re happy about it too, that is.”

She nodded her head emphatically. “I really am. Do you think you can swing it? Fighting aliens by day and changing diapers by night?”

“I’ll do whatever it takes to have a family with you.”


End file.
